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By Jan Johnson Maintaining great skin can be a challenge if you dont know the secrets to having perfect skin. Did you know that what you eat and what you use on your skin plays a tremendous role on the state of your skin? Regardless of your skin type, all skin types should avoid eating fried foods because these foods contain free radicals that are toxic to the vital enzymes in the body. Other foods that should also be avoided are alcohol and caffeine, especially on those individuals with dry skin. Alcohol and caffeine are diuretics that cause the skin to lose fluids and minerals. Basically, the diuretics dehydrate the skin making it look tired and dry leading to premature aging. A great moisturizing secret is to use food from your kitchen on your skin. For example, avocado makes an excellent moisturizing facemask. It conditions the skin leaving it feeling moisturized and looking vibrant. Try this recipe: Mash avocado with 1 tbsp of plain yogurt. Blend well and apply to clean skin. Leave on for 10 15 minutes and then rinse off face. Proper cleansing of the skin prior to applying any moisturizer or facemask is always recommended. It’s best that the pores are completely clean for the best results If you want to learn more about having your own spa at home and healthy living, visit www.homespasecrets.com Jan Johnson is the founder of http://www.homespasecrets.com offering free information on creating your own at-home spa on a dime. HomeSpaSecrets.com also offers healthy living tips and information. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jan_Johnson http://EzineArticles.com/?Great-Looking-Skin&id=50884 guaranteed online personal loans va bad credit loan pogo payday free cell student loan with bad credit

By Lizel Salter South Africans live from season to season, eating what the earth gives them. A variation in latitude and height above sea level as well as the effect of ocean currents causes a great variety of climatic conditions throughout the country. There are three main rainfall-regions, divided into a winter rainfall in the south western part of the country including the Western Cape, rain all year round along the southern coastal belt and a summer rainfall in the rest of the country. Rainfall varies between around 125 mm per year along the arid western coast and 1 000 mm a year on the eastern coast. Rainfall is irregular with less than 10% of the country receiving around 750 mm of rain per year. The other 90% receive less than this. The summers in South Africa are very hot with mostly cloudless days, but in the winter, only a few areas are frost-free. If you travel to South Africa during October to May (mainly) you can go to farms and pick your own fruit. Make sure you check what times they are open so you won’t be disappointed. During November you can watch out for Strawberries. December is the correct month for strawberries, raspberries, loganberries, boysenberries, cherries and peaches. In January you can pick black currents, apricots, cherries, raspberries and strawberries. February is the month for raspberries, strawberries, apricots, nectarines, peaches and apples. During the fall you can pick raspberries, strawberries, nectarines, peaches and apples and during April you can still pick some strawberries, apples and even grapes. So when can you expect to buy certain fruits? Dont be caught out, just take a look at which fruit is in season during the year. Nectarines and plums can be bought from November through to April, while you can enjoy Apricots and Litchis between November and February. Other fruits you can enjoy during the summer months include peaches from October to February, grapes during the months of December to May, melons between January and March and mangoes from December to April. If you travel to South Africa during the colder months, you can sink your teeth into apples from March to September, oranges and grapefruit during the winter and spring months of April to November and grapefruit between April and September. If you are looking for something more sour, lemons is just the thing for you to get during the months of March to November. Easy peelers are available between April and September and my favourite, avocados, can be enjoyed from March to October of each year. Guavas can be bought in May while prickly pears are available during January and February. Pears you find most of the year, with the season running from January to October, while pineapples grow in South Africa all year round. If you love cherries, make sure you keep your eyes open. If you close it for too long, you will miss it! Cherry season is a short 6 weeks, between the months of December and the beginning of January. You can find pretty much most vegetables throughout the year. These include baby marrow, butternut squash, various types of pumpkin, green beans, various other beans, carrots, beetroot, broccoli, cauliflower, cassava, cabbage, cucumber, mushrooms, onions, potatoes, sweet potatoes, peas, spinach, sweet peppers, tomatoes, lettuce, mealies (white mealies and sweet corn, which is yellow) and many more. Potatoes are grown all over the country, so when one part has a winter rainfall and the other a summer rainfall, they transport the produce to the necessary area. Mealies are planted during November and harvested during the month of March. As this finishes, the sunflowers and wheat are planted. Make sure you know which fruits are in season so you know what to look forward to when you travel. All fruit and vegetables are filled with fibre, vitamins and minerals, so make sure you eat lots and lots of it. Enjoy! About the Author: Lizel loves baking and is the author of Simply South African, a traditional South African recipe book that will make your mouth water! To get your hands on this book and read more about South Africa, visit http://www.recipesfromsouthafrica.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lizel_Salter http://EzineArticles.com/?Whats-in-Season-in-South-Africa?&id=149608 bad car credit loan military find free gaurenteed money for nursing student loans pre qualify home loan online hard money lender directory

By Donald Sudy Imagine visiting a facility that allows for medical grade cosmetic procedures to restore skin health and rejuvenate the face and body, maximize health and wellness while in a serene spa-like environment. You would be visiting a Medical Spa. International Medical Spa Association defines a medical spa as a facility that operates under the full-time, on-site supervision of a licensed health care professional. The facility operates within the scope of practice of its staff, and offers traditional, complementary, and alternative health practices and treatments in a spa-like setting. Practitioners working within a medical spa will be governed by their appropriate licensing board, if licensure is required. It would provide a multidisciplinary approach that incorporates traditional cosmetic procedures and wellness with alternative therapies such as acupuncture, chiropractic and holistic care to maximize both health and wellness as well as beauty care. Those that adhere to the guidelines as put forth by the IMSA often have a physician on staff (preferably on site), chiropractors, massage therapists, nutritionists, and holistic practitioners. Advancing technology allows for more dramatic non-invasive and minimal down time cosmetic procedures to fit patients active social and career lifestyle. This, coupled with mainstream acceptance, has led to an ever-growing consumer demand. Numerous facilities are appearing almost daily, whether attached to an already existing medical practice or as a stand alone new practice. Even some traditional hair salons and day spas are enlisting physicians to come by their facility periodically to perform Botox or Restylane injections. With this booming demand, many investors see an opportunity to cash in on this growing market by opening medical spas ranging from one of to franchises. Many non-medical persons are opening up facilities ranging from laser hair removal facilities to medical spas, staffing them with estheticians, laser technicians, or nurses. For a facility to purchase a laser, a physician has to be affiliated with that facility. Thus many physicians serve as Medical Director, yet have no direct clinical interaction with clients in their evaluation, treatment or follow-up. Indeed, for some facilities the physician is not even located in the same community. Some Medical Directors have residency training in Dermatology or Plastic Surgery, while others are from different medical specialties. However, since many of these procedures and technologies are relatively new, current and ongoing postgraduate medical education and training are important. With this rapid growth, many states medical regulations are not keeping pace with the evolving technologies, which result in loose regulatory oversight. In fact many states allow non-physicians to own and operate laser hair removal spas. With increasing popularity and availability of these services, the incidence of injury from these low risk procedures is increasing. While very rarely serious injury occurs (there have been two deaths, including one in North Carolina, associated with laser hair removal and use of topical anesthetic), troublesome injuries requiring evaluation and treatment by a medical specialist are becoming more commonplace. Injuries can include scarring, pigmentation changes, and even blindness. A study on complications from laser procedures by Vic Narurkar, MD was presented this year at the American Society of Laser Medicine and Surgery. He found that 82% of all laser related complications occurred in facilities that had no direct physician supervision.1 Training is another big issue. For example, an esthetician requires a minimum of 600 hours training before being issued a license to perform skin care and superficial peels. However, to operate a laser most states have no set training requirements. In most cases the training is done by the laser manufacture and may be only a day or two in length. While lasers are generally safe in the right hands and most persons have no contraindications, there are a few medical conditions that can lead to adverse out comes. Certain medical conditions, such as Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, adrenal or ovarian tumors, can manifest themselves by excessive facial hair or male pattern hair growth. These could be easily missed if not appropriately screened for. Certain medications can place the laser patient at higher risk for complications. Appropriate medical screening is warranted in all new laser patients. Another concern is what happens if someone is injured. Or, while screening a prospective laser patient, concern of an underlying medical condition arises. Can most of these facilities handle these situations? Does the staff know what to do? Is the staff astute enough to notice that a mole has some suspicious features before performing a laser treatment on it? Is there a physician on site or readily available to evaluate that mole, or treat a complication? Medical spas provide clients aesthetic and wellness care in a serene, relaxing and pampering environment. Most patients will have no adverse outcomes or are treated without injury. However with the increasing popularity of these procedures, adverse outcomes are bound to increase. Having a physician who is actively involved in patient evaluation, treatment and follow-up is an important component to preventing injury. Establishment of a training program with ongoing education and evaluation of all practitioners is paramount. Finally, the ability to treat and refer patients who are injured or have other medical concerns is also important. 1. Complications from Laser Procedures Performed By Non-Physicians. Vic A. Narurkar, MD. Skin & Aging. Sep 2005, pg. 70-71. Donald Sudy, MD Medical Director ReGenesis Medical Spa & Wellness Center Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Donald_Sudy http://EzineArticles.com/?Medical-Spas:-A-Physicians-Perspective&id=125769 pogo payday frecell cheats how to look better on loan papers with bad credit lts cash advance austrilian queensland bad credit lenders

By Todd Going The medical world has worked for decades improving technology and saving the lives of patients by using donated tissue when a situation is life threatening. Kidneys, skin grafts, corneas, hearts and bone marrow are examples of donations that are given to patients who need a miraculous new chance at life. While the tissue and organ transplant industry represents a $1 billion part of the medical industry in the United States, most of these tissues are harvested by legitimate means. Unfortunately, there are numerous amounts of improprieties about the source of donor parts from New Jersey-based Biomedical Tissue Services, LTD. Many people throughout the country are worried that their tissues may not have been properly screened for deadly diseases such as Syphilis, Hepatitis and AIDS. Additional cases have illustrated that thieves have stolen bones from legs and replaced them with plumbing pipes, or removed organs and replaced them with screws before an open casket funeral. When this occurs, there is a significant risk to public health, because these tainted tissues cannot be removed from the patient. In a tainted tissue crime there are two victims affected. The first victims are the people who have received these tissues from their trusted health care providers. The second victims are the families of whose loved ones who have been harmed for the sake of illicit profit. If you or someone you know has been a victim of tainted tissue or tainted body parts you need to seek an experienced tainted tissue lawyer immediately. You have the right to receive financial compensation for your physical suffering as well as emotional distress. Please dont hesitate and contact a tainted tissue lawyer today. To learn more about hiring a tainted tissue lawyer or filing a tainted tissue lawsuit, please visit our website at http://www.sddefenselawyers.com/tainted-tissue/ This article may be freely reprinted as long as this resource box is included and all links stay intact as hyperlinks. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Todd_Going http://EzineArticles.com/?Tainted-Tissue-Lawyer-and-Attorneys-for-Infected-Tissue-Lawsuits&id=206401 hard money lender idaho oroville california cash advance moscow mills bad credit car loan calculating federal tax withheld from paycheck

By Milos Pesic If you know the symptoms of depression, you should also know some strategies for reducing the problem. Depression can be the result of many things, and it is necessary that you avoid those circumstances that upset you or make you feel depressed. Every day, stories appear in print media and television that are mostly negative, highlighting the economic and social deprivations of humanity. Stories focused on destruction, war, crime, doom and despair will only aggravate the problem of depression rather than solve it. Avoid reading such negative stories and events. Helplessness will only add to your depression, rather than cure it. Moreover, always see the positive side of life. Say good things about others, share with them your most memorable moments, and set aside all such moments that depress you. Indulge yourself in lots of physical exercises. A healthy body is the root to a healthy mind, attitude, and thinking. Regular practice of breathing exercises will help you overcome your depression problems. These tips to reduce depression are simple but can work wonders if followed with determination and will. Do not keep too many goals and expectations that will depress you further. Always keep aside one important goal that you think is necessary to achieve. When you try for many things at one go, you only aggravate the problem of depression. There are many research materials and information available on depression and also its effective treatment. You can go through a vast array of information and make those important decisions about your health and ways to cope with your health problems. Although you can reduce the problem by applying the useful tips mentioned on online websites and books on depression, it is your psychiatrist who can really help you out in curing the problem. Depression causes a serious imbalance of brain chemicals and many other internal changes that need serious medication and treatment. It is not something you should be ashamed of. Depression is just like any other illness which just needs full support from the family. Always have a hopeful heart. It is a must to overcome depression. Make few but good friends who will be always there to support you in good and bad times. Never allow depression to grow in isolation. Make it a point to have your near and dear ones around you. Socialize as much as you can when you feel depressed. That will mitigate your problem to a great extent. Watch good movies, especially comedy, or visit funny and humorous web sites or read funny books. Light things will make you feel good and reduce your depression problem. Positive thinking always gets your brain going. Involve yourself into lots of singing and dancing activities that will signal that your brain is really happy. Go for lively music that really rejuvenates the mind and soul and overcomes your depression. Try to engage yourself in as many activities as possible. A healthy routine must be followed to keep your body and mind healthy. Physical exercises affect your brain chemicals, and this can really help in reducing you depression problems. Try to hold as few grudges as you can. This can only aggravate your frustration level and cause depression. The more you learn to forgive and forget, the better for you. Always reserve a quiet time where you can spend quality time with yourself. This certainly does not mean isolation. It is essential because this is the time you give to yourself. Milos Pesic is a successful webmaster and owner of OvercomeDepression Blog. Visit now to find out all you wanted to know aboutdepression and simple ways to overcome it. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Milos_Pesic http://EzineArticles.com/?Simple-And-Easy-Tips-To-Overcome-Depression&id=296036 payday ice therapy hard money lender direct california american cash advance florida hard money lenders

By Kenneth Little You can begin today to write your way to a pain free life. Writing about your condition clarifies issues, presents further questions needing to be addressed and an answer to rid you of the pain. To release yourself use these steps. They bring a new light to your life. They prevent you being a slave to pain. These steps worked wonders for my wife who suffered 10 years long term pain. 1. Decide to Investigate the Real Cause Chose to obey the well-known words, “Seek and you shall find”. The biggest challenge with long term pain comes when the doctors tell you it’s all in your head. They forget they have not endured the misery of years of not knowing the cause. My wife and I found the biggest breakthrough came when we realized, as we kept a personal journal of our experience, that the presenting medical condition was not the real challenge. That meant of course that the medication didn’t work. Having been through more MD’s than we could remember - plus countless specialists- we came across a grand MD who encouraged us with the words - “It will pass”. It wasn’t his diagnosis that caused us to have fresh hope so much as his attitude. Brainstorm to find a caring MD. Write down suggested names for consideration of those you could involve in your quest for a pain free life. 2. Take a Good long Look at The Word Disease You will be amazed at this. When you sit and write down the word disease as “Dis Ease” you have an exciting starting point for getting back a pain-free life. Seeing “Dis Ease” suggests you could write about relationship issues with your loved one. These may have caused a lack of “ease” in relating to one another. That may have caused deep sadness for you. As you write you’ll find new things spring to mind. They need to be dealt with. Deep sadness has been discovered by many as the actual problem hiding behind a medical condition. Extended times of writing about what you think is the reason for the deep sadness brings out the truth. This is no quick fix solution. It takes time. As you persevere think of the blessing of being able to live a pain-free life. 3. Write A Prayer Request for Your Dis-Ease You may have exhausted all medical help for your pain relief. In this case you should write a prayer request and submit it at the Benny Hinn Ministries web site. Many people have been set free from their pain in this way. Their prayer request has proven to be the most important one they ever wrote. When you’ve written all you can on your reflections, and detections on your pain if there is still no relief write your prayer request and place yourself in the hands of the Great Physician- Jesus. Kenneth Little is a writer, teacher, public speaker and the publisher of a re-released classic - in a revealing ebook- that will show you how to get the best of health and wealth out of all your future years. True success will be yours no matter what your age.Amazing “How I Became Young at Sixty” brings renewed strength to your body, hope to your mind and increased prosperity to your lifestyle.==> http://www.Young-at-Sixty.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Kenneth_Little http://EzineArticles.com/?Write-Your-Way-to-A-Pain-Free-Life&id=100579 cash now loans borrowing a personal loan with bankruptcy calculate net paycheck cash advance loans vancouver wa

By Tonja Weimer Would you like to date more? Do you find it hard to be different or look different from everyone else? Do you feel you dont measure up to the standards that other people have? As Kermit the Frog said, it isnt easy being green Kermit has a point. It isn’t easy being green. But try taking a step back and considering the following: being different can be to your advantage. It can be the source of your growth; it can be the reason you begin to look at what you do have instead of what you don’t have; it can become your greatest strength. Lets look at some of the challenges we all face that we think keep us from dating and being successful singles: Difference # 1. Overweight None of us ever thinks we have a figure that is good enough. We have an inner mean critic chirping on our shoulder, reminding us over and over, that our stomach looks like a beach ball and our thighs wiggle when we walk. However–I have clients who consider themselves weight challenged, being much more than 100 pounds over their ideal weight, and they still manage to find love. Very often, people can slim down without talking about their weight, but rather, making agreements around exercise schedules. When the focus shifts from How terrible I look! to, How healthy can I be? and I deserve to feel good! the side benefit is weight loss. Be kinder to yourself if this is your challenge and use an encouraging inner voice to guide you to the help you need and want. Your weight challenge can be the motivating reason you get your life into a healthy mode. Difference #2. Money How many of you out there think you cant find true love because you cant afford it? How much money do you think you should have in order to date? Heres the rule: you have enough money when you live BELOW your means and save something every month. It doesnt matter how much you earnwhat matters is how you live with what you have and how you put away for your future. There are plenty of great dates. In fact, some of the most romantic ones dont cost a thing. (Read How Cheap Dates Can Make You Very Attractive on ezinearticles.com by Tonja Weimer.) Difference #3. Age Do you think you are too old to meet someone and fall in love? Do you feel that opportunity has passed you by? Usually, we feel old when: * We compare ourselves unfavorably to someone much younger than we are. * We havent loved ourselves for what is good about us, but instead, have judged ourselves harshly for what we dont have. * We are not exercising and eating well. * We feel our lives are out of control from too much clutter, too much to do, and too many people we cant please. Work on changing some of the above. And remember: whatever age you are is the perfect age to meet someone and fall in love. Difference #4. Looks Do you think you are just not good looking enough to attract the person you want to be with? Try taking a trip to the mall and watching all the couples stroll along. Do they really look any better than you do? Everyday, people meet and fall in love who do not look like Hollywood movie stars. Looks are influenced by how you feel about yourself and what you do to take care of what you have. Take a look at what clothes and colors can accentuate your best features. And never forget to exercise. That one activity alone can handle a whole host of concerns. Finally, while you may be focused on what is wrong with you, try shifting that focus to what is right. What do people come to you for? What are the qualities that people compliment you about? What have you accomplished in the last year that you are proud of? These are the thoughts you should be filling your head with rather than what direction your thighs are waving. It’s not easy being greenbut you can work it to your advantage. Visit http://www.tonjaweimer.com or http://www.singlesdatingtips.com for more tips, skills, and insight on dating, relationships, singles, and love. Subscribe to our F*ree Savvy Dating Newsletter from master single’s coach, life coach, and syndicated columnist, Tonja Weimer. Copyright 2006, Tonja Weimer. (Please note source if reprinting this article.) Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Tonja_Weimer http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-It-Hard-To-Get-A-Date-Because-Youre-Different?&id=144532 paycheck city direct lender payday loans how to make paycheck tax law on hard money loans

By Sarah Jayne Anderson Halloween is a time when children of all ages can dress up and have a good time. However, it is also a time when taking safety precautions is vital to prevent the fun on Halloween night turning into a tragedy. Halloween safety involves a good deal of practical common sense but in the excitement of the night that common sense can often be forgotten. Planning ahead can help to make safety part of your family’s Halloween routine. Sadly, some people have been known to lace some treats with dangerous items such as razorblades, bleach or drugs. So, it is important for a parent to do their best to make sure their children don’t become a victim of such behavior. A good start is to establish a policy with your children that they are not allowed to accept any unwrapped food such as apples or cookies. Also set the rule that they are not allowed to eat any of their candy until it has been brought back home and you have had a chance to check over every item in their bags for any signs of tampering. Some hospitals make their x-ray machines available on Halloween night so even wrapped candy can get a good examination. If your local hospital is one that offers this service make it your last stop on the night. Usually they make the atmosphere fun so your children are likely to think it is just part of the Halloween fun. Of course the temptation to tuck in to such a large amount of candy will be difficult so make sure they eat a large dinner before they set out on Halloween night so they are less tempted to raid their goodie bags. Of course, they have to collect the candy first and that means going out trick or treating. Children bellow a certain age should always be accompanied by a responsible adult that will be able to make the judgment calls they may not be capable of making. Never let a child enter a house without their chaperone. It is tempting to hang back a little bit to let them knock on the doors by themselves. There isn’t anything wrong with that but make sure they are never out of your sight.Older children that go out on their own should be required to provide their parents of a general plan for their trick or treating. That way you have an idea of what houses they will be visiting and roughly when they will be there. If they having mobile phones arrange a variety of times that they are required to call you and touch base. If they miss a call and aren’t answering their phone you should then be able to use the plan they drew up to know where to look for them. Safety precautions should also be taken into consideration when helping your child select their Halloween costume. If their Halloween costume includes a mask make sure that the eye holes in the mask are large enough that your child can see clearly out of them in all directions. This is particularly important if they are trick or treating on foot and will have to safely cross from one street to another. Making sure the costume isn’t too long for them is also important so that they aren’t in danger or tripping over the bottom. Falling down can be embarrassing but it an also be very dangerous if they are crossing a road. Also, since there are a lot of candles around on Halloween night it is a good idea to check that the costume is made out of flame-retardant material. Taking a few simple safety measures can help to make sure you family’s memories of Halloween night are joyful and not full of regret. Sarah Jayne Anderson is a writer that was born and raised in the United States and not lives in the United Kingdom. She also runs a halloween themed website at Halloween Costume Ideas Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sarah_Jayne_Anderson http://EzineArticles.com/?Keep-Your-Kids-Safe-On-Halloween-Night&id=291842 el paso refinance car loan bad credit kentucky pay day cash direct bad credit lender second chance payday advance

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Keith_Rickwood]Keith Rickwood The popularity of Internet has made shopping easier for all of us. You just have to sit in front of your personal computer and log-on to any online shop of your choice, select a product and pay through secured payment gateway and within a couple of days, the delivery is at your doorstep. Another important advantage which Online shopping offers is that, you can research about the market place, look for various options available and then buy a product of your choice and all this, when you are sitting at your home. Surveys by many firms have indicated Internet shopping as popular among buyers in the United Kingdom so much that every Company has its own website where its products are available for buying. Not to be left behing mobile companies(manufacturers, service providers, retailers etc) too have gone online and have websites where buyers can purchase their desired products. The reduction in operational costs as you don’t need much manpower and infrastructure( compared to high-street showrooms) allows these mobile companies to pass on some of the benefits to the customer. The result is, you will get a mobile phone at a lower cost via online shopping than you would have got the same handset in the mobile shop, near your house. If you want to avail the best mobile phone deal available in the webworld then sit infront of your computer and log into any search engine and enter ‘best mobile phone deals’. Alternatively you can also consult any of your friends and colleagues who do shop online and ask for web adresses of a few mobile companies. Its important to make comparison on the prices offered by different sellers. Look for discounts and talktime plans(in case of contract mobile phones). Choose the best mobile phone deal out of the options available and pay either through credit card or through bank account and wait for your order to deliver. This way you will not only save a few pounds but will also save a lot of time. And, before I end it, do check the authenticity of the website before you make any payment. [http://www.mobilerainbow.co.uk/ ]Mobile Phone Deals Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Keith_Rickwood http://EzineArticles.com/?Go-Online-And-Shop-For-Best-Mobile-Phone-Deals&id=462723 online payday how to recover an unpaid personal loan real bad credit personal loans fast hard money direct lender

By Greg Baer Is this you? Your husband doesn’t pay any attention to you at all. He doesn’t even hold your hand anymore. He doesn’t look me in the eye when we talk. You used to go dancing. You used to talk. Now you do nothing together, and instead he criticizes the way you do everything: the way you cook, the way you take care of your daughter, that you never want to have sex with him. You need a husband who loves you? What can you do? I’m sure you two were once madly in lovewhy else would you have gotten married?and I’m sure it just makes you crazy wondering what happened to those days, right? In order to be happy, what people need most is Real Loveto be cared for without any conditionsbut very few of us received much of that. Instead people liked us-praised us, thanked us, accepted us, treated us well, all that-when we behaved in ways they liked. Almost all of us have seen that from the time we were small children. And it’s only natural that people like us more when we do what they want, but it’s not Real Love. Without Real Love, we simply cannot be happy-anymore than we could live without air and waterso when we don’t have enough of it, we automatically reach out for whatever will make us feel good in the moment. And whatever we use as a substitute for Real Love becomes a form of Imitation Love: praise, conditional acceptance, power, pleasure (including sex), and so on. When you and your husband first met, there was an enormous trading of Imitation Love. You both just showered each other with every kind of attention you had to offer. But it was not unconditional love. How do I know that? Because the effects of what you were giving each other wore off-that’s the hallmark of Imitation Love-and you both became disappointed and irritated (other signs of Imitation Love). When you get to that point, the trading stops. It’s no fun anymore, so why trade? That’s all that’s happened with your husband. He’s not a monster. He’s not intentionally withholding love from you. He’s just gotten to the point where the Imitation Love you used to give him just isn’t as rewarding as it once was, and he’s not willing to pay for it. So he chooses to do nothing at all with you. He doesn’t consciously realize what he’s doing. He just knows he’s not happy, and in great part he blames you for that. After all, once upon a time you did make him happyat least what he thought was happinessand now you don’t. Pretty natural that he’d blame you for how he feels now. And you blame him. But it turns out that neither of you is to blame. What a relief, actually. Your relationship has gotten sour not because of what he’s done, or what you’ve done, or what either of you is not doing. Your relationship is failing because both of you came togetherfrom childhoodwithout enough of the one thing you absolutely had to have in order to be happy as individuals, and in order for you to have a chance at a healthy relationship: Real Love. If you want to blame someone, blame your parentsboth sets. They are the primary reason you don’t feel loved unconditionally. But remember that they did the best they could, too. If they failed to love you unconditionally, it was only because they weren’t loved unconditionally by their parents either. And on it goes. So the blamingof anybodyis a waste of time and energy. All that matters now is what you’re going to do next. And you need to learn to be more unconditionally loving. Learn more about unconditional love. As you learn to be more unconditionally loving, you’ll bring to him the Real Love he’s been missing his whole life, and that will create the possibility of miraculous changes in him. I’ve seen this happen over and over now, hundreds of times. As one partner learns to be loving, it makes all the difference to the other partner and to their relationship. Now, you might ask, why should it be you who has to change? Shouldn’t he be learning how to love you better too? Sure, but if you sit around waiting for him to change, you could be waiting forever. somebody has to take the first steps that change everything. Why not you? You now understand your relationship a lot better than he does. You know what steps to take next. So get started. Find the Real Love you need, and share it with your husband and others. You’ll be unbelievably glad that you did. Remember, it’s always about Real Love. The world is literally dying from a lack of the one thing essential for our happinessReal Love. We spend our entire lives trying to replace that unconditional love with praise, power, sex, money, entertainment, safety, and so on. But it never works, and the resulting emptiness and fear are almost too much to bear. We dont have to live like this anymore. Greg Baer and RealLove.com are teaching (1) the real cause of fear and anger and (2) how to find this Real Love that replaces the fear, anger, and conflict in our lives with peace, confidence, and genuine happiness. Dr. Greg Baer is the author of 16 books, DVDs, and CDstwo of which are internationally published by Penguin Putnam Groupand has presented the life-changing message of Real Love to hundreds of thousands of people all over the world. For more information on Real Love, including hours of free streaming video and audio, visit www.RealLove.com . Youll be grateful for the rest of your life that you took this step. 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